My first ever book is getting closer to publication. And I’m starting to worry.

I know, I know. I should be happy/excited/proud. Not nervous. But… taking words out of my head and putting them onto a page is one thing. Putting all those pages out for all the world to see is very different.

Is my book any good? I have not the slightest clue.

Unimpressed readers

When an author first starts a book, it’s all rainbows and glitter and insta-love. It’s the Best Book Ever.

Then it comes back from the beta reader, and this book is clearly a complete waste of time and you are obviously an inept bumbler who should never have been allowed near a keyboard. Be off with you. Find a new hobby.

Then comes revisions, and it’s like eating dust and ashes. The story is dead, there’s no life to it, you should just delete it from your computer and burn any hard copies.

Then it comes out and… this part is hypothetical, but I’m guessing there will be one of two possible scenarios here:

• Zzzzzzzz…. crickets…zzzzzz…. maybe a one-star review on Amazon if you’re lucky.
• What, someone liked it? It’s not the absolutely Worst Book Ever? Maybe even not the Second Worst Book Ever? Hey, maybe it’s even made it up to the level of the Third Worst Book Ever! Success!

tl;dr — I am trying not to think about the upcoming publication of His Forgotten Fiancée. This week, I’m finishing up the smooth draft of Neil and Samantha’s story, tentatively titled Sierra Hostage. Then I am giving myself a month to go over the revisions for Geoff and Lia’s story before I send it to the editor. Keeping busy helps.

All I can do is focus on finishing the current story. Then the one after that. The next one will be better. Each time, the next one will be better.

Rachel Neumeier wrote an interesting post on The Psychology of Revisions.